Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Thursday, August 2, 2007
Monday, July 23, 2007
Monday, July 2, 2007
Friday, June 22, 2007
AND SIDELINED HERE LIKE A BOXCAR
AND NOW THE SHALES
AND LOVE CAUGHT
AND IT'S SOMETHING
AND IT SADDENS ME
AND IF I WERE TO CALL TO YOU
for Alysia who fills the firebells
with the ancient wines of a prodigal spring
standing at the gates of the moon
And if I were to call to you
like a bell of blue water on the moon
from which I am continuously born
to be scarred by the mother of darkness,
every leaf of my shining, a farewell
and a crossroads in every step of the journey,
my heart an endless shedding of faces and skies
that have withered and fallen away
like the petals of a black rose in a dark mirror,
the strawdogs and homeopathic masks
of abandoned rites of passage
no longer crucial
to the eye of the lamp
that held itself up to the world
like a flame astounded by its own seeing.
If I were to call you, solitude to solitude,
an echo in the abyss of a longing moment
to embody the dark matter in robes of light,
could you hear me, would you listen,
would your own blood flow like a poppy
from the untended wound
of the solitary nightbird
that answers its own loneliness
when it is urged by the saddest harps
of the most distant stars
to give up its burden to the darkness
that floods its heart like a tide of black comets
and drunk on the shapeshifting
sing softly in gratitude
for these gentle suggestions of being?
The river mingles what it will,
and the leaves that ride the current,
scriptures of the autumn tree,
are neither rudders nor pilots,
but paperboats sent downstream afire
by the brief shadow of an inspiration
to return life to life like rain and stars to a well.
If I were to call to you
across the pews of these windows and waves
of unsummoned passion and thought,
like the first church
of a sea on the moon
full of drowned messiahs,
what would be the odds against you
feathering the miracle
with electric violins of emotional razor-wire
shorting out in the rain
like a lightning storm
raving to separate the iron chaff from the silver grain?
Would holy mountains bleed
like the dark ores of heaven
poured from the fire-grails of the stars
into the keys and crowns
of a supple radiance
that breathes like a candle? Burlap or silk,
or the arable silts of your alluvial skin,
would the abdicated thrones of the flowers
be sticky with honey and gold,
could we turn the vinegar
that hammered the wings
of the dove to the door of our dreams
with the taste of wounded nails
to a trance of wine
that would make an afterlife seem like a hangover
compared to the sweetness
of lacing the waters of life
with a frenzy of dancing stars;
could we grace the voice of the bell
with the blossom
of a wedding among apricots,
could we be happy despite ourselves,
despite what we know
about the shadows and eclipses
pariahed in the garden
by the snakes and burning swords
that drove us away like refugees from our own gates
to suffer and die
alone with everything in our solitude,
offering the scars of our eyelids
like the withered leaves of the generations
to the silver herb of the cool mercy
that flows from the weeping fingertips of the stars
trying to read us like braille? Knowing the weary victory
of the tree after a brutal winter,
the dangerous longings bowered
in burning casements of ice,
pondering the pathos of the impossible,
all the orchards and skies we’ve looked through
like a theatrical wardrobe
to star the seed in the apple,
is there a ribbon of road
we might untie together,
a flower or two
we could tumble out of like bed?
I have endured the delirium
of the glass thorns
on the last rose of blood
to surrender to the frost of the night,
I have drawn the crescent of the moon
across my throat like a horizon
so that the message could be the bird
that seeks out the green bough of the heart.
My heart has been inflated like a universe
by the intrepid glassblowers
that thawed my eyes in the furnace
like deserts purified by the wind
that sweeps the shadows from its stairwells
to receive the silence of the dark and divine.
If I asked heaven for only one flower
that opened alone for me
would it send me you;
would it be your face I waited for
with the goblets of the mirrors
to watch awaken like wine in the morning,
the first magic of fire,
of life in the sea,
the effortless mystery of my spontaneous devotion
to the dawn that slept beside me all night
her tenderness the flame of the orchid
fragrant with the intimate secrecy
of insatiable encounters? Would you stretch, naked,
like a compass before me,
your body half-submerged in the surf of the bedclothes,
limbering up its harps and bows
as if it would bask in its own music like water,
and everything I looked upon was human and holy,
and even the ashes of our lust,
the lees of a drunken fire,
happier than honey
to have burned with transformation
in the shrine of the hive? Dark queen,
you are the new moon that keeps to herself,
effaced on both sides of the beginning,
barely the whisper of a dream remembered
like the echo of a pulse of a sea
that once filled your empty glass with night.
And I have stilled the panic
of the small, warm bird
that hurled herself like a rock
through the brittle window of the world
when space turned into glass
and even lightning couldn’t pick the lock
the way a flower can split the heart of a stone
by easing it apart like a parachute;
I have carried her in the boat of my hands
to an island I know in a river
where every flower is a sky and a well,
a chalice rimmed with the wings
of mysterious visitations,
and opened the palms of my hands
like an ancient daybreak
to let her heal in her freedom
and fly deep into her own voice,
knowing how brutally
I would miss the morning.
I have been the leftover star of her flowering,
and my heart, the old shoe
longing for a road, a journey
it never took, as its blood frays
and wanders away like shoelaces
and hairpin turns down a mountain.
I could walk to the stars with you,
I could descend into the basements
of my own interrogative isolation cells
with a key and a pear
that fell from the eye of compassion like a tear
and forgive the unknown accusations
that make me torment myself
like a mad monk
lacerated by his own clarities.
I could have run to you like an embassy
and found sanctuary
in a life embraced by the gates of the wind,
retuning my stars to the moondial of the mountain.
And I could lavish you
with stars and jewels, candles, trinkets
poppies and snails,
and the gowns of gardens
that died for love of a shadow
the light never cast,
and ignite the fleets of my poems
like fire-lilies on the midnight streams of your blood,
stringing the empty silo of your supple guitar
with lightning, the perfect pitch
of the fangs and tuning forks
that startle the silence
with an unknown language that moves
like the caress of a slow caravan
raining bells across a desert on the moon.
I could fill your wineskin
with immeasurable skies
that would open like eyelids in your blood,
and I could be the sea
and whisper secrets into your ear at night
that would make every heartbeat seem
like the pilgrimage of a wave,
and I could enthrone
the illegitimacy of your deepest ignorance,
the troubled echo of the solitary bird
that searches your valleys
for the ghost road of a lost migration
in a tree of light where every leaf was a map
to someone waiting for you to find him.
I could be the thorn and the trigger,
the switch in a dark room, the candle
of the approaching eclipse that enthralls you
like a stranger in the shadows
with the effloresence of his eyeless light.
I could turn my coffin into a lifeboat
and wash up on your shores
like a drowned sailor in the night
enchanted to awake newly robed
in the seabed of a sorceress
tired of her lonely shapeshifting.
I could walk with you
under the orchards of the faces
you release like wounded blossoms,
doves of lime on the wind,
the cloudy fruit of the poems
you saturate and sweeten
on the bough of the witching wand
that trembles like a mirror
over the watershed of your tears,
the sad angels you’ve mingled like elixirs
in translucent menageries of water,
and account myself one of the lords of life
to be devoted to your lips, and eyes, and earlobes
in a realm where the tribute
I placed like my life on your stairs at night
is gone in the morning
glowing with acceptence
like the gentle breath of a warm rain
that yields itself to the effulgence
of the sacred flowers
that would break over your feet
like a tide of shedding petals.
And you would not sit
below the salt
at a feast of scars,
because I would break bread with your pain
like a harvest threshed by the full moon
and every crumb
would be the nugget of a dream
you rubbed like sleep from your eyes,
pollen kneaded like words
in the mandibles of a bee
that would sway like a bell of honey
in the tower of love you woke in
like a bird under the eaves
of the ore of blood
embedded in the rock of the world
like a palace, all the hovels of your heart
breaking open like seeds
to reveal their hidden skies
and mystic tents of light
in an eye of water the sun could not blister,
or the hot wind steal like a jewel
from the crown of a clock of sand.
If I have laboured beautifully
among the fireflies
to ignite a glimpse of the world
that wasn’t grimed by the smouldering
of dragons caged like coal in a furnace,
if I have squandered myself like lightning
to illuminate a single drop of rain,
if I have scrutinized myself
like a bloodbank for roses
my heart a used palatte of autumn gardens,
such a hurt world,
so many bleeding bells,
so many lanterns
dying of thirst
beside a river of fire,
who wouldn’t try to ripen the mud with light
to show the lost stars of our swarming humanity
the way home to the wildflowers
in the far fields that wait to sweeten our suffering
with luminous eyes
that have rooted themselves,
however the storm raves,
like lighthouses and brides in the dark?
And maybe my voice
is only the thunder of a falling eyelash,
and this vision of us
only the stirring of dust at my heel,
a gust of stars
blown into the eyes of time
to be washed out in tears,
and this rag of light
that I hang like a curtain
at the broken window of my soiled radiance,
this petal of the sea,
this feather and whisper
of sky and nightwind
that I crave to live like the page of a holy book
fallen from the white rose
of an ancient lucidity
passing like the shadow of wings and clouds
over the view, is only another snowflake
on the igneous altar
of another spiritual cremation
betrothed to the laconic modes of smoke
it charms from the marrow of a smouldering bone.
It’s hard to grow ivy on a tornado,
to live in the shadows
of the clashing swords of the grass
and not be carried home on your shield from time to time,
and there are wise men whose words
sear the heart like glacial marrow
and songs I’ve heard in the groves of beautiful women
that have cured my heart
with the kiss of a spear of fire
dipped in the iron tears
of the mother-bell of their sorrows.
I could do nothing to save them;
I could do nothing to save myself
and toppled like a stone pillar,
sank like a lead lifeboat
into the emergency depths of just enough of myself
to know the madness and the danger
of walking on the bottom alone, bleeding,
a puppet in a gulfstream of garbage and gardenias,
trying to convince myself
that it was all my fault.
The colour of my blood changes like a mood ring
and I am chameleon enough,
salamander enough,
dragon enough
to wear the locket of the butterfly
as the badge of my infinite transformations,
transcendence the only return address I’ve ever known,
sometimes the black scythe of a wind
that cuts the wrist of the rose
and then a labyrinth of burning doorways
framing the body of a woman
that could make love
without shaming the fire, events of the heart,
the random genetics of starmaps
that led me to the buried shining
I struck like a vine of jewels
while trying to dig my grave;
the perennial wine of utter extinction
in the ferocious oblivions of penumbral clarity,
the last unsayable insight, the dark womb
I will be born again from
to slump down drunk and broken
on the worn threshold
of my most cherished agony.
The tree didn’t ask for apples,
the sky didn’t summon the stars,
and there’s no end of the lilies
that clutter the port with their sails,
making a cornerstone of the wave,
but nothing is written in ink or blood or water
nothing reflected indelibly
in the qicksilver of the eloquent mirror
that isn’t an eye born with wings
that evaporate like mornings in a forbidden desert.
If I were to call to you
like a needle longing for a thread of blood
could we mend this slash of dawn
the stars keep pouring out of
like a miscarriage of seminal destinies,
could we unlace the stitches that have been written
like secret scars on the closed lips
of the healing silence
and converse in the native language of the dark
in a whisper of eyes
under the blossoming sheets,
an orchard of skies enshrining a rumour of fruit?
Could we divine the flesh of the moon
with a sword of light
that released the dark harvest
of an inexhaustible eclipse
gathering stars like grain
to feed the famine in the fire
that keeps our hunger alive?
If I were to call to you,
if I were to cast my longing
into the shape of a bell
with the heart and voice of a bird
singing like a tendril of light in the vastness,
would the blossom answer the vine,
your poppy of fire
ignite my inflammable blood
and set the night ablaze
with stars and prescient apples
hanging from the burning candleabra of the trees?
Or would you bury the pillar
in the soft moss of your sex,
and root your garden in the wind,
letting the weeds overwhelm it like clouds,
and call the chaos freedom
or feeling the darkness contract with enlightenment
enhance the horns of the moon
with hyacinth wreaths
and garlands of visionary fire
culled from the blood of the unknown seers
who walk a blind road in a crucial dream
like lanterns and fireflies
through the shadowless valleys of the heart
that rings with the echo of keys
falling like water over the skulls and the stones
of those who sought without finding,
of those who drank from their own reflection
like a bruise, of those
raised like night to the lips of the beloved
who leaked out of themselves
like funeral candles extinquished at their own wakes
through a crack in the cup of the moon?
Deeper than the volcanic fissures
that douse their torches and dragons
in the deepest trenches of my blood
with the savage intensities of thermophilic species
that have learned to live without light,
your roots are enthroned within me
like the wicks and fuses,
filaments and threads of fate
that the stars and flowers cast out
like nets and veils and constellations
from the trawling boat of the heart
to catch the mystic eel of the moon
I lay at your feet like a carpet of living silver.
Language is a colour-blind pauper
when I dream of the life and love
I would lavish like a planet of opulent shadows
on the least urging of your light
to answer the knocking of your heart
at the door of the mystic fire-seed
that longs to flower in you like a bell in the night.
And if I were to call to you
and you were to wonder,
if I were to try to say the unsayable stars
caught in the throat
of my voiceless wells
like the vowels of birds trapped in a chimney,
and you were to pause and wonder
like a weathervane
at the crossroads of the wind
if the voice you heard is wine or chalk,
or a vow of rain in a lunar desert,
as soon consider the fountains
that are chained like keys
to these lifelines of water
sewers of blood in my veins
than doubt the iron of the bell
that calls to you
is the pulse of a predictable eclipse.
I wait for you like the sea
at the floodgates of the moon
the harp of a golden fish
ribbed like a bridge, a boat, a hand
to move like a whisper of love
in the affinitive depths of your encompassing waters.
And whenever I think of you,
whenever I altar your humanity
in the temple of a sacred mirror,
and sweeten my devotion
with the fragrance of summer stars
burning like incense, like honey, like pollen,
like gold in a mountain river,
a white flower blooms in the silence
of the eloquent eternity
that exceeds its own ineffability
with the alpha of your name
alighting like the wayward kiss
of the first vagrant butterfly
to part the lips of the bell.
I toll like a garden under the eyelid of a dream
or the tidal mouth of this infinite ocean
that has set my heart adrift
like a bottle of singing fire
to true this island on the moon
like a seabird off the passionate coast
of the woman who allures me
like a bay of stars in the night
to burn the rags of these tattered sails
like the clothes of a dead sailor
who dared the edge of the world
to drown in the unfathomable abyss
of the dark bride
who poured herself out like an eye of wine,
the tears of the moon in a chalice of seeing
to temper the metal of wounded swords
scarred by the flesh
in this igneous bell of longing
that canters like a white horse of water
through the turmoil of her phantom waves
returning like blood to the pearl of his heart,
the silver apple of the sea
she layered with nacreous skin
letter by letter like the phases of the moon
unspooling the universe from a grain of sand,
and hung on the dead bough of the clock
that leans like a tree out over the sea,
a battered heartbeat of wind and tide,
a wandering monk with a begging bowl,
a priest of the lightning
witching for water
with a burning branch
of green stars crowning the seed
that opens its book of tender prophencies
to root its bell at a fork in the river,
the firefly of the world
in the well of the black-robed light-giver
that parts her waters like the gown of the moon,
her darkness a carillon of eclipses and lilies,
a solar system of black cherries
dancing like a wounded chandelier of blood
with a planet in exile, a bell, a bird,
the voice of a heart in the night
waltzing through the shadows and light,
the sidereal deserts of an aberrant orbit,
praying for passage
that the sea might open like an eye
and fill the bells
of the wombs and udders and hives of a promise
with prophetic comets of milk and honey
that flow like the stars, like blood, like light
like the empty bells and pails of the heart
that come down to the river
to scoop the blossom of the moon,
the petal of her face from its mirror
and drink like a bee in an orchard
from a windfall of flesh and light
that house the pulse of the bell
in the towers of the shining palaces
I approach like a bouquet of homeless keys
to undo the chain on the secret stargates
and spread the wings of the dawn
that ripens like an eye
in the mysterious fruits of the night
that fall to earth
like a drop of blood, a locket of rain,
the soft thunder of the urgent heartbeat
of a tree on the moon
alive in a bedlam of waking birds
that nest on a branch of lightning
tuning each to the bell of the flood
that flashes through me
like the ocean in the face
of the woman I love
who undoes the rose like a ribbon of blood.
PATRICK WHITE