Sunday, September 2, 2012



Won’t mean much if your eyes aren’t open in your blood.
If the stars can’t see you because you don’t know how
to read them poetry in the small cafes of your heart
accompanied by spoons and plates and broken goblets
of the cheap house wine that smash just like love affairs
dashing your skull against the rocks, hoping the mermaids come back.

If you can’t hear in the parking lot of a raucous industry
the colours of your emotions, you’re a deaf chameleon
and who could make you listen to what you can’t listen to
even if you had enough people who loved you around you
to want you to try to listen to your own tears when you cry?
Your ear on the same wavelength as a corrugated tin roof,
maybe you can see what I’m trying to say to you
if you close your eyes, and just listen to the rain without
trying too hard to make a big effortless effort to be
auditorily enlightened by the racket of your delusions.

I can’t remember when my life stopped being my own
and I went to bed one night, and I was as human as my toes are
and I awoke, I was merely the afterbirth of a visionary
I didn’t recognize, as my eyes were being igneously wrung
from a cope of dark ore like stars out of the distant hills.
Not a lot of self-respect from the beginning, maybe
it wasn’t that hard becoming everyone and everything else,
and I was a prime candidate for effacement
but when I looked into the mirror of my
ten inch, equatorially mounted, clock-driven, reflecting telescope
I used like a canning jar to capture and mount stars and fireflies
on a black velvet starmap, all I could see
was this abyss staring back at me that couldn’t say
where I’d gone, but the last I thought I heard
was that I got a job as a janitor in an hourglass
sweeping mirages out of a desert of private school stars.

I say what I see as it occurs to me spontaneously.
And I’m compelled to say it without hesitation
so the vision isn’t tainted by the colour of the jewel
it’s passing through, from one eye to the next, ad infinitum.
No light pollution in the shining, though there’s something
about the idea of purity that continues to appal me
because I never had so much against chaos from the beginning
and I sense a deep hatred of all that is soiled and flawed,
in which case, I’d rather be an outlaw than one of these monks
who disdain me because I can’t help seeing their discipline
as uncreatively redundant. Eventually, if they’re blessed,
all our faces are going to fall off by themselves
like the scabs of sunspots that healed the wounded light
like a wildflower shedding its petals like nurses’ caps
and deathmasks frozen like a moment in time meant
to last forever though we go on being estranged by them forever.

Uncanny transformations of the solid into the real.
Maybe it’s time to let the mindstream flow as it will
and let the burning bridges of our delusions cross us for a change
to get to the other side of a life that’s only got one bank
and it’s as clear as space, we’re not even standing on that.
Hang on. Let go. It’s just your hand opening and closing
like a door in a dream, and you’ll find your falling
just as fast as you ever were and if you were to ask your eyes
they couldn’t tell in this vastness whether your were falling up or down.

When you’ve dismantled all you’ve desired,
post neo-deconstructionism sets in like spiritual rigor mortis
and you can’t tell if you’re sleeping with the living or the dead
when you haven’t got your mask on. You can wear holes
in your shoes, and windows and carpets, pacing
like a waterclock of the heart in an hourglass of waiting
like a boy at the edge of the curb with his elbows on his knees
and his face in his glum hands, waiting for a parade
with sacred clowns throwing away free candies
like stars along the route of the mystic Milky Way.
Just be sure to keep your eyes open like a spring thaw
so the light can recognize you like the flower that brought it
to full illumination this time last year like a candle
that keeps blowing its petals out so you can see
the black matter of what you are not deeper
into the eyeless dark than you’ve ever bloomed before.




I could bring you a shattered windowpane,
I could bring you a musical whip that’s been trained
to read the stops of your flute
and how your fingers move like windproof spiders.
I could bring you the red brick of dried blood
that was left of my heart when I threw it through the window,
and it broke into a thousand chips of rose petals
that shed like flakes of dried paint off the eyelids
of a revolution that hasn’t woken up yet
to finish what it started in a recurring dream
of mystic junkies flagging their fits
until Faustus sees Christ’s blood
streaming across the firmament like mother’s milk.

Should I ever come to know you well enough
to let you drink from my hidden starwell in my field of view,
I could raise your spirits up like a candelabra
to be whatever constellation you wanted
among all these myriad stars dying to be given a focus.
And if at first you didn’t know where you were, I’d be your locus
until you got your sea legs on the moon,
and learned to walk on fire without getting burned.

You could be the punk mermaid who beguiled
the seasoned sailor of my oceanic awareness
you were still flinging your nets far and wide over
like spatial tides of ionized wavelengths
keeping time with the stars in a Babel of voices
that stratified the lyrics of the seven visible celestial spheres
that could be seen with the naked eye
like the black grammar of the multiverse
trying to keep the light in some kind of context.

And if I drowned to compliment your singing.
You could write a biography of bubbles
about my life and times in the depths with you
and I’d be happy to sign it in the cursive spring
of the year’s first seance to prove
every word I’ve said to you is a cult of the true,
even before I began to write secret loveletters to you
in the nebulae and clouds of unknowing in the stars
that precipitated out of my breath on a glacial windowpane
of an ice age that couldn’t thaw fast enough
for me to open my eyes and see you shining
in ten thousand lakes all at the same time
like the orbits of a prophetic skull at vernal equinox.